whiskey & jay

Some people never go mad. what truly horrible lives they lead

for lucy

we all crawl underneath

our beds

to die alone.

- sometimes

when we’re

young

we burn everything

in our paths

to find flowers like you.

or look into

cave paintings

for the spark of life

in the cinders 

of time.

the scarlet lips

burn 

asking me

to grant her

poetry

or sex: what difference does it make

- she’s beautiful. i 

can love her

if only she lets me.

no flowery language, no cynicism

- lets fuck

and dine with the

gargoyles of the pits

reading this,

- people

shrug off

the nonchalance

and comfort

themselves

with watered down wine

& love.

i look for it in

child’s play

- books

about

you me or some other phantom

the way a cat stalks its own shadow

- in death’s laughter or alchemical riddles

love is pretty

secretly

eying us from

dark

taverns 

swearing

and farting in tune

with its no.7 

in a pitcher

- where’s the whore

it says

- where’s my meal

it says

western civilisation

has burnt love to the

ground with a cross

- out onto the bum

streets

fishing for fag butts

whilst art gives its

daily blowjob

to the press,

romance is dead.

- i agree

but you and i are not.

let’s share our lives

like the

oxygen

from aching veins.

lets make love

and pant like

 chaotic tigers.

lets loathe

and curse

and spit

and rage

and never be

whole again.

because perfection is death

and i don’t want to die just yet,

they were too busy dusting their coffins for signs of life

no loss is a greater loss

my winnings all declared

insane by

some hack across the

perimeter

- all failures born men, slowly become gods

the wine is drunk

bacchus

dances with no

tunic on,

giggling the man whispers

into my ear:

i don’t understand,

these words,

this poetry,

your life.

- blackened smoke

teeth and fangs

all ready to go

rancid in the

rain,

go see a shrink

you are not fit

to run with the rats

in this race

you are wrong

like happiness 

or death

- i look into his deathless eyes

the mascara fades like

a scar on the world

the war is never won,

yet the beauty left

over has won me

more times than wrong or right

open up all the windows in the classroom and let the air back in

the bums are back in the 

corridors with their

dirtied overalls

and bad music

- i don’t mind them much

they smell with their

laughter

cackling like dead horses wives

shoes on the pavement that dig

and grind small men

into hamburger

make my day sonny boy!

daresay i will sir

the leers come out during the

day, 

and my rainforest

sings no songs

since its river

dried up and

ran away

Laziness is only justified when you put some work into it

—the heart

tibetan monks sat facing jesus whilst the whore strips away her bare bosom shows

and i said to myself

man sure does not need

spirituality, 

esoteric wisdom

and biblical tracts

to live in this

sore in the 

ceiling

content with

alcohol

fifteen different

kinds of

drugs,

cocaine

viagra

cigarette smoke bared

down on us

like

greasy fingertips

on a puddled 

afternoon

man needs no light

the darkness is

as beautiful

as life on fire

cats make better dogs

to argue again

with

beauty of unashamed

hatred

you 

must

first

find the reason

why you

spit 

and cursed like

mad dogs

under the pregnant

moons,

why you chose

this person

to battle with

after bed:

come sunshine, rain

or drought-filled

dream scape,

why you chose this 

person

to walk through fire

hold your

scorched hand

and kneel

with you

as the embers

lick your souls

dry

i woke up after

a six month coma

to notice the world

unchanged by

my old man

glare

i’ll start

with a sentiment

about a girl in

black

who’ll never read this

my cliches give me

an erection

though she never did

life mistakenly

burdens the

man who climbs

too often

with the stupid

weight of love 

the lost curse

of the damned

where fires have all but

burnt

and it wicks out the 

last remaining flame

like an opiate

gone mad

the memories of that night

where she danced

nymphlike

play across my aged

mind like a haunted

vcr never once pausing:

it’s been a while since i used

the facilities

mum dad, all those friends

like ghosts go haunt the

words and expressions

you make dancing furiously on

your remains

falling apart hurts

but not as much as them

then half a year goes past

you lose someone, who appears

fragile like cracked glass

never noticing the mirror’s laugh

as you walk past trees of people

filled with fateless 

fantasy

Mistakes are the portals of discovery

—Life

i came across

clouds 

of sulphur, mercury

meth all drowsily

dancing in my back garden

and i shooed them

freedom:

my parents hate that kind of thing

taxes, careers

the eight hour crunch

you escape the

rites and rituals of

a 5 day a week 

brainwash

and yet you find

no love around the corner

where silver and myrhh were promised

and the fat man with the cigar

boxes away all 

the promises beaten dead with a stick

maybe he’s waiting for you with smiles

and cheese

no dreams for you today sir, no

closing the door to all who are not 

whores in satin

smokeless apartment buildings

where the fan clicks 

in semi - automatic rage

just wait, i’ll show them, my time will come

he says

typing into a website filled with

nerds quoting proust

only understanding the ethics of

masturbation

next door

the neighbours kid screams

about something

and it is a bit more real

today

right about 12

past noon and the

sailor dropped

his cap into

the smiles of

the gutter

- lady walked legs

and ass high

her make up was rouge

like roses in the garden

of my childhood

but her lust was so

evil i cried for

satan: he wasn’t getting a piece of that ass

- i go home, before the shift

begins

the sandwhich butter bread routine

stands still with the images

of children at the door

all standing still

all waiting for rewards

all afraid of punishment, never heard of death

my halloween is golden, i was dancing 

with a head full of liquor

till i was scared by some girl

who reminded me of a memory

and the drunken daze is confusing

and surreal when poets

and idiots alike call it 

“love”